[Verse]
Listen, Tana Mongeau, I don't fuck with you
All you do is click-bait, just to get some views
Your storytimes are fake, but not as fake as you
In order to blow up, I wonder who you blew
You're verified on Twitter, and on Instagram
But your numbers falling down, so I made a diagram
You got rhinoplasty, and said that it was medical
You didn't fool anyone, 'cause you're not fucking credible
Your nose job sucks, it looks just like a spoon
I can't even tell, Squidward Tentacles or you?
Everyone has said it, Jenna Marbles wannabe
But only one of you has a master's degree
This will get no views, 'cause your flow is dumb
Check your SocialBlade, you'll never be Ricegum
I don't mean to hurt you, but you're a nobody
You couldn't even get a Teen Choice nominee
Someone called you funny, it's obvious they lied
You look just like that Barbie Shane Dawson deep-fried
We all know you're forty, you ain't fuckin' eighteen
If you stopped buying subs, you could buy some wrinkle cream
You lie about your age, and graduating school
You only ever passed if you blew the principal
Your lashes look like spiders and it isn't Halloween
But with no makeup on, you make everybody scream
And shut the fuck up, no one wants a Bleach & Tone
Why don't you just drink some bleach so you can die alone?
I'm only spittin' truth, I don't mean to deprecate
But Freelee wasn't lyin' when she said you gained weight
Fuck your Periscope, I will never give you hearts
You'll do anything on YouNow for a couple thousand bars
You say YouTube famous, I think that's a stretch
You still ride in Ubers even though you said they're sketch
Don't even get me started, Kylie Jenner copycat
You bought the same bag, and that fucking dog rat
You only get collabs, 'cause they feel bad for you
You paid a million people to subscribe, like, and view
You ride in lots of Ubers but you're going nowhere
Please fix your crooked teeth, Tana, you need dental care
All raves are 18+, how'd you even get in?
Everybody knows that you were sucking mad dicks
Your hair is fucking yellow, it couldn't be more dead
It looks like someone superglued string cheese to your head
I could go on all day with the Michael Jackson jokes
You looked just like him, before you fixed your nose
Shane Dawson made fun of you, so did PewDiePie
AyyDubs and Onision made you fucking cry
You're an unemployed bitch, and blowjobs don't count
I don't know what's smaller, your ass or bank account
And your tits are flatter than a flat tree stump
If you ran for president, I'd have to vote for Trump
Are you Gandalf the White or Debbie Thornberry's twin?
Don't hope for a Streamy, 'cause you won't fucking win
You only get them views when your tits debut
You have a vlog channel? I had no clue
I beg you, please stop talking - or yelling, should I say?
Your voice sounds as if you smoke a pack a day
Isabella and Jordan are your only friends
You bribed Isabella, Jordan takes ten percent
If you're watching this rap, you might disagree
I hate Tana Mongeau, she's not my cup of tea
I need to make my point, my feelings overall
I'm so sick of Tana, she's a washed up fuck doll
My last lines are this - you should unsubscribe
Because the truth is, Tana ran out of storytimes