I - I have been- I have been waiting

I have been waiting for all of my life
Searching for someone to find me
I have been patient for all of this time
...this time
I have been hiding alone in my room
Looking for someone to see me
But I think I know now what I need to do
...this time

So I'll wait here tonight
So I'll wait here tonight, yeah

Why can't I have what I see all around me?
The creek-bed I lie in disguises the drowning
I reach for a hand but I can't seem to find one
It's getting hard to breathe
Am I different? Am I broken?
Is all that I am just a moment that's passed?
Am I tainted? Has my soul left?
Thе fact that I ask myself shows where I'm at

So I'll wait hеre tonight
So I'll wait here tonight, yeah
The time that I've wasted, it can't be replaced with
The smile that I practiced, that just mocks me now
And I can't explain it, describe or rephrase it
My mind without you there's like a haunted house

Have I come as far as I would have liked to believe that I have?