[Verse 1]
It's part porn
Part true dectective intro
Just went blonde
They have more fun
I've been told

[Pre-Chorus]
And now I only have a first name
Just call me Zayn, Malik was lame
Now I'm like Sting, Hitler and Bono
I like all types of birds
As long as they're models
This Girl weighs less than both her shoes
These Boxing Unicorns are making Uniporn
Hey put some hearts on that girls boobs

[Chorus]
Now lets make dreamy faces
Stick the footage in premiere
Make everything look smeared
Put a flower on her Labia
Tattoo lyrics on her neck
Now here's some gibberish
Yabba Dabba Do
Babadook
Mamaduke
I can do what I want
No more 1D guys
And raging hormones
She's a porcupine
This is a poor song
[Verse 2]
Pillow F***
Is what I do when she's gone
F*** f*** f********!
Now I'm cool! I drop F bombs

[Pre-Chorus]
Why is my so expressionless?
If I feel great or I'm in pain
It stays the same, irrergardless
Blood's pouring from your eyes
You must be hungry
Please let me make you some beef stew

[Chorus]
Hey lets get out of this hell
Cause this sexy acid trip
Is making us feel sick
Lets go home and watch Seinfeld
It's on eight times a week
And it still holds up

[End-Chorus]
In the bed all day
Watch TV endlessly
Eating crisps with some dips
Watch Family Guy
And getting our friends on
You Boxing Unicorns can put your clothes on
And you can go home
I'm now the Justin Guy
This is my End Zone
[End]
Justin Guy, Justin Guy, Justin Guy, Justin Guy
End Zone, End Zone, End Zone, End Zone