[Spoken]
To listen to your messages, press one
To change your personal options, press four
To listen to your messages, press one
To disconnect, press star

[Verse 1]
I call you every day but you never get back to me
I've been checking my voicemail obsessively
It's been seven months since we've last spoken
Are you avoiding me or is your phone just broken
Your sister told me you were seeing someone new
Well I am too and she's hotter than you

[Chorus]
I'm in love, love, love
I'm in love with the voicemail lady, (Press one)
I'm in love, love, love
And she's gonna have my digital babies, (Autoplay on or off)

[Verse 2]
That's right girl you've been replaced
Cause she's my soul mate but I've never seen her face
I love the way she asks me to enter my PIN
Now I'm hot and bothered and ready to begin, yeah
[To turn your me on, press one
To control me, press two
To enter me, press three
To pound me ass, press star]

[Verse 3]
I'm on the phone so much they say I'll get a tumor
I'm not really worried cause I think that's just a rumor
I'm frustrated but I've got no choice
She's never ever touched me but she gives good voice
I've found the address of the girl that plays her
Then I put on my tie and my nicest blazer
Then I ran up to the door and I rang the bell
Then her husband walked out and said 'What the hell?'

[Spoken]
Hello and welcome to, bitchslap town
You have selected to get your ass kicked
Rated R, don't ever go near my wife again
Rated R, If you'd like to get your ass kicked again
Press one

[Chorus]
I'm in love, love, love
I'm in love with the voicemail lady, (Goodbye)
I'm in love, love, love
I'm not sure if I can still have babies
I'm in love, love, love, (Are you still there?)