[Intro: Announcer]
Ladies and gentlemen, put your hands together for Katniss Everdeen
The girl on fire!

[Verse 1: Anna Harrington as Katniss Everdeen]
Can't decide which boy I like
Gale is buff and Peeta's nice
In this dystopian future
Don't know which cute dude is cuter
Eenie, meenie, minie, moe
I'm catching fire down below
Two dreamboats blowing up my phone
I'm like a post-apocalyptic Bridget Jones

[Chorus: Anna Harrington as Katniss Everdeen]
(Gale or Peeta?) It's the end of the world
(Gale or Peeta?) These books are catnip for girls
(Gale or Peeta?) A sci-fi chick fantasy
(Too much weiner) A Battle Royale with cheese
(Pure Velveeta)

[Interlude: Anna Harrington as Katniss Everdeen]
Everybody say "Rue!" (Rue!)
Everybody say "Rue!" (Rue!)
Put three fingers in the air like you just don't care
Give it up for my homies in District 12
(Oh, sorry about that)
[Verse 2: *Doug Larsen as Gale Hawthorne*, **Mark Douglas as Peeta Mellark** and ***Mark Douglas as President Snow***]
*I don't get to eat enough
But somehow I'm totally buff*
You were engaged to Miley C
So you might carry an STD
**Come on, Katniss, please pick me
I made myself look like a tree**
***Marry that tree or your family dies***
Ew, I hate people set me up with guys

[Chorus: *Doug Larsen as Gale Hawthorne*]
Gale or Peeta Peeta is hella cute
(Peeta fever) But Gale's a forbidden fruit
(He's much leaner) *Hey, don't call me a fruit*
(He's no genius) I was named after a root

[Verse 3: *Mark Douglas as President Snow*]
Evil Santa has blood breath
He laughs when kids fight to the death
His name is Snow 'cause he's not hot
*Hey, that hurt my feelings a lot*
I can bake but I can't swim
God, you're a bigger wuss than Prim
You're such a damsel in distress
Maybe you should be the one in the flaming dress
[Chrous]
(Gale or Peeta?) You both are so poorly drawn
(Maybe neither?) Your acting is making me yawn
(He's no Brando) Must lead the revolution
(Screw this game show) No time for getting it on