[Refrain]
Bearded, bearded nu-un
Bearded, bearded nu-un
Bearded, bearded nu-un
Bearded, Gaga

[Verse 1]
You ask where I get my ideas from
I used to get them from my gay husband
But predictable is what he has become
So now I only listen to the nun

[Pre-Chorus]
(Ha-ah, ah-ah-ah, ha-ah, ah)
That was a good one
You are comedian

[Chorus]
I don't know what he is but I think he's the shiz
So I'm worshipping the Bearded Nun
I know a lot of trannies, geeks, and circus freaks
But he's easily the wеirdest one
I'm not sure if it's a dudе
'Cos I've never seen it n***
Puts on lipstick with a gun
The father, son, and Bearded Nun
[Refrain]
Gaga, I'm home
I brought food for the gnomes
Are you here alone?
What the Gaga?

[Verse 2]
How the hell could you do this to me?
Get thee to a bearded nunnery
What are you doing home on a school day?
School is closed for Kathy Griffin Day

[Pre-Chorus]
I challenge you to a weird-off
Of fives round, the loser leaves town

[Breakdown]
This is the championship, it will decide who is hip
Here's Lord Gaga's first attempt (ohh, that was nice)
And now the nun's at the plate, he slaps a cat in the face
And builds a gingerbread house with his mind
Here's Lord Gaga's retort: he's putting on his cheese shorts
And then he brings out some mice (okay, that's weird)
Looks like the nun's on the ropes, he calls in the Bearded Pope
Who gets a razor and shaves off his beard (no!)
[Chorus]
I guess that means he won but now his beard is gone
And that's where he gets his power from

[Refrain]
Bearded, bearded nu-un
I think we're done
Dear gay husband
Accept my apolo-Gaga