The Key of Awesome
Winter Girls Song
[Intro: Todd Womack & Mark Douglas]
Ah yeah, lay it down that sensual massage chair
'Cause it's winter time
Ooh, it's cold, but I like it
Just slip your gloves on (slip your gloves on)
You wrap a scarf around your neck and face
Like a sexy Russian peasant, if there is such a thing
Then you get one of them things that's not a hat or a headband, it's kinda both
What the hell do you call that head muff hat band?
I don't know but it's sexy as hell
And I'm willing to bet it was on sale
[Verse 1: Todd Womack & Mark Douglas]
It's winter time and the living is freezy
Women are like dwarves, grumpy and sneezy
Angry faces and chilly cheeks
Wind blows so hard that your eyeballs leak
Well, let me tell you about my particular fetish
See, I like a girl's nose when it's runny and reddish
The colder it is, the more I get hot
I'll make out with your nose, I don't mind the snot
[Chorus: Mark Douglas]
When it's cold as a witch's you-know-what
You can call me a squirrel 'cause I'm busting nuts
[Verse 2: Todd Womack & Mark Douglas]
Walking out of the Starbucks with a grande tea
Puffy coat makes you look like a manatee
You hit a patch of ice, trip, slip, and fall
Right now you don't feel too sexy at all
That's where you're wrong, girl, you're looking fine
Sliding down the hill on your behind
I don't care if you're classy, I don't mind if your trashy
Just as long as your skin feels dry and ashy
I'll take you home, heat you up, 'cause your my frozen dinner
Now put your hands in the air for the girls for winter
[Chorus: Todd Womack & Mark Douglas]
Winter time girls, you know you really rock my world
Snug as a bug in rug, wearing nothing but gloves and Uggs
Winter time ladies, c'mon let's make some frozen babies
(That don't make no sense) (shut up)
[Verse 3: Todd Womack & Mark Douglas]
Now we're back in the pad with two frozen chicks
I put on some jams, a cool wintery mix
There's no need to rush things, let's just chill
Can I interest you in a vodka-Nyquil?
I got her in the room, she said "my hands are frozen"
"Can you turn up the heat?", I said "nah, it's broken"
I suck your frozen toes while you blow your nose
Let's put on more clothes, girl, I don't need to see those
[Chorus: Todd Womack]
Most dudes just wanna see your breasts
I wanna turn up the AC and see your breath
[Verse 3: Mark Douglas]
Some like the lights on and some like it dark
I wanna cover you up like Kenny from South Park
She said "that's cool, I understand the rules"
Let me go slip into something less comfortable
She went out and came back covered head to toe
She was moving kind of slow but was ready to go
We fooled around for a while 'til we needed some air
I uncovered her face and it was covered with hair
[Chorus: Mark Douglas]
Winter time hoes, just made me make out with my bro
[Outro: Todd Womack & Mark Douglas]
Ugh, that's was disgusting, man, eww
Yeah, that was gross but, like, if we're all covered up, what's the difference really?
That's a good point