[Intro: The Stupendium (as Sans & Papyrus)]
So I said "Patella? I barely know her!"
Sans! Stop your tomfoolery, we are here to stand guard!
Wait here, and keep your eyes out for humans
Eyes out? My eyes came out years ago!
Well, what do we got here?

[Verse 1: The Stupendium (as Sans & Papyrus)]
They call me Sans, I'm the serif (sherriff) of these parts
Nah, just kiddin', I work on a grease cart
Grillin' up hot dogs and genocidal toddlers
You can run but I'll know if you restart
If you want a bad time, then you're in the right place
Just look into my eye, see my funny typeface
I'm rеally quite a nice guy, but if pick a fight
I will hunt you all your life, through timе and space
Can you blame me if I feel a little hubris
For my fame for making things a little humerus (humorous)?
I could tickle your bones to the tibia (tip of ya) toes
Well unless you're my bro, jokes flew over his head
Sans, who's there, you ridiculous scamp?
No one! It's just a inconspicuous lamp
If you ever meet a skeleton in towels and some wellingtons
Just humor him and let him win and think that he's a champ
I bet you think you've never met a skeleton
Well, I bet you've Mettaton (met a ton)
They just had a bunch of gooey melanin and flesh upon
But never one was in the upper echelon of clever puns
I'll make you laugh or cry depending on the run you've set upon
[Chorus: The Stupendium (as Various Monsters & Sans)]
We're spooky, scary, sending shivers down your spine
You'd best prepare for a hilariously bad time
Every human one day ends up six feet underground
But you're headed for a grave that's buried way, way deeper down

[Verse 2: The Stupendium (as Papyrus & Sans)]
Ah! A human! Call the guards!
Wait a minute, that's my job
To capture and nab you won't be hard
This maze is made with electric charge
Wait, how did you get this far? (Huh?)
It took three weeks to erect this part
I genuinely didn't expect this, darn!
How did you correctly guess this path?
I am Papyrus! Traps set, armed and ready
There's medals on my armor already, oh, plus some spaghetti
You're nervous! But, oh, that is good spaghetti
Oh, oh, where was I? I keep on forgetting
I am Papyrus! Best chef in the king's brigade!
With the culinary skills to leave you flambéed!
It's a shame that after you taste my blade
You won't have space for my Bolognese!
So I guess you could say that they pasta-way (passed away)?
Sans! Is this how you have to behave?
I'm trying to challenge this dastardly knave!
But now I've run out of bars and they just ran away!
[Chorus: The Stupendium (as Various Monsters & Papyrus)]
We're spooky, scary, sending shivers down your spine
I serve spaghetti and incredibly good rhymes!
Every human one day ends up six feet underground
But you're headed for a grave that's buried way, way deeper down

[Bridge: The Stupendium (as Napstablook)]
So you took a little fall?
Do you think you've got the gall to survive extermination
Trapped deep below, and all you've got to show is your determination!
There's no tu-Toriel (tutorial), it's Asgore-y (as gory) as can be!
Will the weight of your sins leave you Snowdin (snowed in)?
There's no mercy!

[Verse 3: The Stupendium (as W.D. Gaster)]
Who dares disturb me from my slumber?
Stick around, this'll be a fun number!
I'm truly versed in tearing all the universes asunder
But I also have a specialty in unlucky spelunkers
I'm a puzzle in a bubble in the stuff of your dreams
Rupture realities and guzzle on the stuff in between
You'll be befuddled when I mussel in and muddle the scenes
Hit the shuffleand I'll tunnel through the fuzz on your screen
You're in trouble, you see, If you try to tussle with the W.D
You'll take a tumble then you'll crumble into rubble, debris
I bring the muscle to the scuffle plus a couple of beams
But my blasters won't be loud enough to muffle your scream
When you're caught in the cycle of an undying skeleton
Might as well strive to be front of the peloton
Top of my field, but out of my elements
Testing your death would be a welcome experiment
I reign eternal so be certain that I'm well rehearsed
Rhymes so very fine that every line feels like a multi-verse
Every parallel dimension is at my command
But when it comes to spitting fire I've the matter in hands
[Chorus: The Stupendium (as Various Monsters & W.D. Gaster)]
We're spooky, scary, sending shivers down your spine
I'm outside of time and space, but I'm afraid you're just out of time!
Every human one day ends up six feet underground
But you're heading for a grave that's buried way, way deeper down

[Outro: The Stupendium (as Papyrus, Sans & W.D. Gaster)]
Ah! I’ll get them next time, Sans
You hear me, I will! (Way, way deeper down)
Let me guess, you can feel it in your bones? (Way, way deeper down)
Ugh, I’m going!
Listening to the two of you bicker is making my skin crawl, metaphorically (Way, way deeper down)