[Verse 1]
Okay
I want to tell you guys a story about a band called Nirvana
You probably know this story already, but whatever
They were a good band, man, a really good band
They had this awesome third album, lost them a lot of fans though
Had this great track on it called Tourette's that went
"Ba da ba na na na na num na na na na num"
Doesn't really work over these chords, anyway... I've totally lost my train of thought
Uhm
Oh Yeah!

[Pre-Chorus]
Kurt Cobain's dead and I'm reliably informed that

[Chorus]
Courtney did it!
She did it!
Courtney did it!
Courtney killed Cobain!
She did it!
Courtney did it!
Courtney did it!
Courtney killed Cobain!

[Verse 2]
I don't know why we blame it on her
It seems easy to say "Courtney Love is capable of murder"
Without having much of anything to back that up
I might be going out on a limb here but I think
Society doesn't seem to like women at the best of times
But we get really mad when they fuck our rockstars, you know?
"Kurt Cobain belongs to us" we cried
So naturally when he died
Everybody said:
[Chorus]
Courtney did it!
She did it!
Courtney did it!
Courtney killed Cobain!
She did it!
Courtney did it!
Courtney did it!
Courtney killed Cobain!

[Verse 3]
She raised that kid on her own
Yeah yeah yeah yeah
She's got problems
Don't we all have problems?
That would be exacerbated by living life in the public eye?
Need I remind you, this poor human being lost her husband when she was barely 29
And we repay her, how? By hassling her on Twitter fucking seven hundred times a day
Her phone goes: ping, ping, ping, ping
99% of the times it's saying the same thing, it's saying:
"Good evening Courtney Love. It is I, MKUltraTruther99 and you will be no doubt nervous to learn I have been carrying out an independent investigation into the mysterious circumstances surrounding your husband's suicide. Kurt Cobain's suicide note is four paragraphs of a man preparing to leave you and retire from the music industry followed by four lines at the end in different pen, in different handwriting, in which he talks about suicide. Pretty weird, Courtney. Pretty weird, not incriminating on its own. However, following your husband's death, in your possession was found a piece of paper on which you had been practicing his handwriting. What had you been practicing? You had been practising the last fucking four lines of his suicide note. How do you explain that? I'll tell you how I explain that:"

[Chorus]
You did it!
You did it!
Just admit it!
You killed Kurt Cobain!
You did it!
Just admit it!
Just admit it!
You killed Kurt Cobain!
(Kurt Cobain, Kurt Cobain, you killed Kurt Cobain)
(You did it, you did it, you did it, you killed Kurt Cobain)
[Spoken]
Pretty convincing, isn't it?
I know, I find it convincing more often than I don't but then I am particularly vulnerable to these kinds of stories
You know, there is a question that I ask myself about once every 18 months, once every 2 years or so and this is a question that smart people ask themselves every day, multiple times a day, I would go so far as to say that's the question that keeps a smart person smart
Four words:
What. If. I'm. Wrong
What if I'm wrong, what if- what if reality is exactly as it seems
What if 9/11 was not an inside job carried out by the American military-industrial complex against its own people to justify a series of power-grabs in the Middle East, what if it was just a reaction to decades of carelessness and aggression, centuries of imperialism?
What if JFK was not assassinated by his own government, he was murdered by one man, one confused and lonely man, who preferred the reality inside his head to the reality outside of it, I can relate to that, who wanted to be a hero, I can relate to that as well, who probably died not understanding why he wasn't a hero, why everyone was so mad at him?
You know, Kurt Cobain had a genetic predisposition to, in no particular order:
Substance abuse, paranoia, depression, anxiety, not to mention he was a member of the music industry. These qualities put a person at particularly high risk of suicide
There
Simple
Tidy and, most boring of all, it just makes sense
We are vulnerable to these kinds of stories
Partly because they make our world seem less chaotic but also because if you stack enough of these stories one on top of each other you block out the bigger story, the story which is as terrifying as it is verifiably true and that is that we are marooned out here, stranded on a rock in the middle of nowhere and bad things are gonna keep on happening to good people until, one day... one day the worst thing is going to happen to all the best people at once
An asteroid will hit, or we'll start a nuclear war or we won't put enough money into developing new antibiotics and a super-virus will wipe us all out, and if we manage to avoid all of these things one day the icecaps will melt and if we manage to survive that one day the Sun's going to explode and there is no hope of rescue or escape because who is there to rescue us? Where is there to escape to?
We are not taught how to deal with these things and so we are left to our own devices to come up with ways of distracting ourselves
Sex and drugs and Rock 'n' Roll
And that's just what works for most of us but for some of us this is not enough and those are the people who fly passenger jets into skyscrapers, those are the people who kill presidents, those are the people who load up on guns and splatter their brains out all over the family home while people like me, arseholes, the intrepid keyboard detectives willing to say the things no one else is willing to say because they can see the things no one else is willing to see will explain to everyone who will listen, with unbearable fucking smugness and unrepented glee that

[Chorus]
Courtney did it!
She did it!
Courtney did it!
Courtney killed Cobain!
You did it!
Just admit it!
Just admit it!
You killed Kurt Cobain!
(Kurt Cobain, Kurt Cobain, you killed Kurt Cobain)
(You did it, you did it, you did it, she killed Kurt Cobain)
(Kurt Cobain, Kurt Cobain, na na na na na)
(You did it, you did it, you did it, she killed Kurt Cobain)
[Outro]
You raised that kid on your own