[Intro segment]
Fellas – you feel like singing a chorus with me?
(The band cheer in agreement.)
There's enthusiasm for you. Hey look, I'll give you a rough idea how it goes. It starts off with me going like this: one, two, a-one, two, three, four...

(Harris' wobble board starts playing.)

And you come in in E, Paul
That's it. And then altogether, fellas...
That's nice, haha!

[Spoken song-intro section]
There's an old Australian stockman, lying, dying...
Ahh...
And he gets himself up onto one elbow
And he turns to his four mates who are gathered 'round
And he says:

[Verse 1]
Cut your hair once a year, boys
Cut your hair once a year
If it covers your ear you can't hear, boys
So cut your hair once a year
All together now!

[Chorus]
Tie me kangaroo down, sport
Tie me kangaroo down (oooh!)
Tie me kangaroo down, sport
(You must do that "oooh!" bit...)
Tie me kangaroo down (oooh!)
[Spoken bridge]
Ha, ha, ha! Dear, oh dear... I've forgetten the words now
Take care of me, make sure, look out after me...
Keep goin'...
(Laughter)
(Oooh!)

(Paul McCartney:) Take care, look after me, [inaudible]

I'll go again...

[Verse 2]
Don't ill treat me pet dingo, Ringo
Don't ill treat me pet dingo!
(Sung in a Liverpudlian accent:)They can't understand your lingo, Ringo...
So don't ill treat me pet dingo
All together now!

[Chorus]
Tie me kangaroo down, sport
Tie me kangaroo down (oooh!)
Tie me kangaroo down, sport
Tie me kangaroo down

[Verse 3]
I think George's guitar's on the blink – I think
George's guitar's on the blink
It shouldn't go mm-nnga-mm-nnga, plink!
Hey, hey – that's really on the blink!
All together now!
[Chorus]
Tie me kangaroo down, sport
Tie me kangaroo down (oooh!)
Tie me kangaroo down, sport
Tie me kangaroo down

[Verse 4]
Prop me up by the wall, Paul
Prop me up by the wall
I'll scream and cheer 'til I fall, Paul
If you'll prop me up by the wall...
All together now!

[Chorus]
Tie me kangaroo down, sport
Tie me kangaroo down (oooh!)
(That's where it should be – there: "oooh!")
Tie me kangaroo down, sport
Tie me kangaroo down (oooh!)

[Verse 5]
Hey, keep the hits coming on John
Keep the hits coming on (oooh!)
At least 'til after I'm gone, John
Keep the hits coming on
All together now!
[Chorus]
Tie me kangaroo down, sport
Tie me kangaroo down (oooh!)
Tie me kangaroo down, sport
(I got it!)
Tie me kangaroo down

Give us a bit of did-i-did-i-did-i...
That's it...

[Verse 6]
And with his very last gasp he says:
Tan me hide when death comes, chums
(Rolf coughs a few times) Oh dear...
Tan me hide when death comes
So we tanned his hide when he died, Clyde
And Ringo's got it on his drums!
All together now!

[Chorus]
Tie me kangaroo down, sport
Tie me kangaroo down (oooh!)
Tie me kangaroo down, sport
Tie me kangaroo down!

[Outro segment]
(Laughter)
What a phony bunch of laughter that was. What about messing up that ending after all the rehearsal we did? At least once
(John Lennon): You forgot the words didn't you Rolf?
At the beginning...