[Verse 1]
I'd like to drop my trousers to the world
I am a man of means, of slender means
Each household appliance
Is like a new science in m-my town

[Chorus]
And if the day came when I felt a natural emotion
I'd get such a shock I'd probably jump in the ocean
And when a train goes by, it's such a sad sound
(La-ha, da-da, da-deem-da-da, duh-widdle-da-da-dum)
It's such a sad thing

[Verse 2]
I'd like to drop my trousers to the Queen
Every sensible child will know what this means
The poor and the needy
Are selfish and greedy on her terms

[Chorus]
And if the day came when I felt a natural emotion
I'd get such a shock I'd probably jump in the ocean
And when a train goes by, it's such a sad sound
(La-ha, da-da, da-diddle-wa-da-da, duh-widdle-da-da-dum)
It's such a sad thing
[Instrumental Break]

[Verse 3]
And when I'm lying in my bed
I think about life and I think about death
And neither one
Particularly appeals to me

[Chorus]
And if the day came when I felt a natural emotion
I'd get such a shock I'd probably lie
In the middle of the street and die
I'd lie down and die, woah, woah