2 o'clock
I pull up to the hotel
Sallys late
But she lookin fine as hell
I let it slide
So we can hook up on ride
Her lips taste so waxy
I never wanna leave this taxi
We get out and walk away
During the play all i can think
Is these actors are corney
But I pretend I like it cuz im horny
At the intermission sally was on a mission
Flirting with george
Trying to forge connection
Then we skating and I can't help but to give sallys ass an inspection
I hate new york
I hate these phonies
Sally we’ll run t vermont and then u can truly know me
I disagree says sally
I leave her there
Just like everyone else
She doesn’t care


Life's hard when you are sixteen
It’s Nothing like a dream
I just wanna scream

I left the rink
Thirsty I go get a drink
Got milk at the drugstore
I was just so bored
Wanted to call Jane
But I was scared of the pain
I don’t wanna get rejected
So I protected myself
Sidetracked myself into thinking
About the show off jane had been clinging to
Eventually I got the guts
I called her
No response the whole idea was nuts
I then call my dog Luce
Invited him for a sip of the ol juice
With time to kill
I go to a show for a quick thrill
The Christmas spectacular
Followed by a quick flick
Both made me sick
So dip
To the wick


Life's hard when you are sixteen
It’s Nothing like a dream
I just wanna scream

At the bar i sip champagne
Im just tryin to ease my pain
Sitting there lonely
But my boy luce the phony pulls up
Half a drink in my cup I know what i have to say next
I ask him all about sex
He suggests i need a psychoanalysis
But i just wanna know about a girls anus’
I ask him if he's ever been analyzed
He leaves
I order a drink of the biggest size
After a while i'm hammered
I staggered into a phone booth
I shoot sally a call
It didn’t go well
And now her grandma wants a brawl
Strike one
I ask the singer Valencia
Her rejection was a piercing stinger
Strike 2
I give the hat check girl a whirl
Strike 3
I’m out
Out to central park
Trying to find them ducks
I break phoebe's record
Life sucks
Its brick
Definitely don't want to get sick
Thinking about six feet under
Like my brother

Life's hard when you are sixteen
It’s Nothing like a dream
I just wanna scream


Low on dough
I decide to go
Back home
Hopefully Phoebe's alone
I convince the man at the elevator
That I'm just visiting and i'll leave later
I move slow
As it tiptoe
In the room of D.B
Lays Phoebe
So peaceful
So young a feeble
I wake her
She couldn't be happier
She's beaming with energy
I'm still feeling that hennessy
After the comotion I see a change in her emotion
She realized im home early
But I had to see my girly
Dads gonna kill you
Dads gonna kill you
She realizes I have gone rouge
I step outside and roast a bogue