[Verse 1: Dirt Nasty]
A tisket, a tasket, what's in Dirt's basket?
Three hits of acid hidden in the Chapstick
And some Arabian ass whips
That'll turn your balls into Albania salad
Go play the pepperoni
On the only child unicorn see-through pony
Blow me a kiss
And I'll blow one back in the shape of my dick

[Hook: Andy Milonakis & Porcelain Black]
One, two, we won't fuck you
Three, four, better lock my door
Five, six, forget your baby dicks
Seven, eight, I'd rather masturbate
One, two, we won't fuck you
Three, four, better lock my door
Five, six, forget your baby dicks
Seven, eight, I'd rather masturbate

[Verse 2: Andy Milonakis]
I post up in B.H. with all the fucking palm trees
Your mama's so good that she can palm trees
Why the motherfuck do I put up with all these zombies
I pop a perk with the purp just to calm me
There's trannies eating cupcakes in cartoon world
I'll fuck a real zebra and a cartoon squirrel
My girlfriend broke up with me because I'm growing dreadlocks
That pussy ain't mine no more; I call the shit my Xbox
360, getting nifty with my flow, boy
Hit your grandma, she nicknamed me Old Boy
I put the tequila in my tortilla soup
I'm on Target.com, I'm a order me a suit
[Hook: Andy Milonakis & Porcelain Black]
One, two, we won't fuck you
Three, four, better lock my door
Five, six, forget your baby dicks
Seven, eight, I'd rather masturbate
One, two, we won't fuck you
Three, four, better lock my door
Five, six, forget your baby dicks
Seven, eight, I'd rather masturbate

[Verse 3: Riff Raff]
Yeah, the strippers topless, cocaine-flavored nail polish
Pull up at your cottage, sell narcotics at your college
50 rags taxing, money not subtracted
Trying to stack my Jacksons, hanging with my Anglo-Saxons
Money stretches, still flexing the self-explosives
Pockets look like deep-sea ocean floor aerobics
Cold quotables hide the baking soda inside the German village
Pull up on you artificial fillers, Pepsi cola caterpillar
Pinstripes, glass china
Made by Sinclair, fistful of Oregon Trail
Stuffed inside the Steve Harvey tupperware, good luck
40K on the princess cuts, get my dick sucked
Watching Nip & Tuck

[Hook: Andy Milonakis & Porcelain Black]
One, two, we won't fuck you
Three, four, better lock my door
Five, six, forget your baby dicks
Seven, eight, I'd rather masturbate
One, two, we won't fuck you
Three, four, better lock my door
Five, six, forget your baby dicks
Seven, eight, I'd rather masturbate