[Verse 1: Shirley Simms]
Oh if only you were the only boy in town
For then I could not play the field and let you down
I would not go half-mad for each passing lad
With eyes of blue, green, gray, or brown
No, if only you were the only boy in town

[Verse 2]
Oh if only you were the only boy in France
Our life would not be like one long, long, long seance
I think I would endeavor to love you forever
Instead of only for the nonce
If-if only you were the only boy in France

[Verse 3]
With the only boy in town
With the only available male
In the loneliest possible world
There would be no daily betrayal

[Verse 4]
Oh if only you were the only boy alive
And I were the queen of our small, small, small beehive
Though more pricks than a cactus may always distract us
Would they all take up all my sex drive?
Not-not-not if you were the only boy alive
[Outro]
Oh if only you were the only boy in town
Oh if only you were the only boy in France