[Intro]
Bart!
Go to your room
Yeah, right
Well, you're damned if you do
(What are we talking about?)
Well, you're damned if you do
(Where's your sense of humor?)
Well, you're damned if you do
And you're damned if you don't
Bart!

[Verse 1: Bart, Homer]
Let me start at the start, then take it away
My name is Simpson, Bartholemew J
That's Bart, with an art, and a capital B
Then Simp, plus S-O-N, that's me
Introductions aside, let's move right along
You can all sing along at the sound of the gong
Once upon a time, about a week ago
All of a sudden, trouble started to grow
Alarm was buzzin', I was snoozin'
S'posed to get up now, but I was refusin'
To let reality become an intrusion
'Cause in dreamy-dream land, I was cruisin'
But the buzz kept buzzin', my head kept buzzin'
Gave the radio a throw, and heard an explosion, (Homer: D'oh!)
Opened up my eyes, and to my surprise
There stood Homer, and his temperature risin'
I was chillin', he was yellin'
Face all distorted, 'cause he was propellin'
It wasn't what he said, but more of his tone
The usual jive, put your nose to the grindstone
I said "I'm real sorry" but that didn't cut it
I started to protest, but Dad said Shut it
Get up, mow the lawn, move it, on the double
'Cause if you don't, you're in deep, deep trouble
[Hook]
Trouble
Deep, deep trouble
Run into trouble
Where's your sense of humor, man?
Deep, deep trouble
As we go a little something like this, hit it!

[Verse 2: Bart, Homer]
So I'm in the front yard, mowin' like crazy
Sweatin' like a pig and the sun is blazing
Homer's in the driveway, getting in the car
With Mom and Lis', hope they're going real far
Then dad yells "Bart!" and I go "Yo!"
He goes "You done yet? and I go "No"
So he goes "Oh! You're too slow!"
So I step on the gas, to speed up the 'mow
Didn't see that sprinkler underneath that tree
Wham, crchh, pssshh! Raining on me
I go "Whoa!" Homer goes "D'oh!"
Now you can't go to the boat show
This is my thanks after working my butt off?
Homer revs the motor and they all start to putt off
Soaked to the bone, standing in a puddle
No-one needs to tell me I'm in deep, deep trouble
[Hook]
Back: Trouble
Marge: Go to your room
Homer: Bart!
Bart: Yeah, right
Marge: Bart, go to your room
Back: Deep, deep trouble
Marge: Go to your room
Homer: Bart!
Bart: Oh, gimme a break
Back: The young begins the trouble
Bart: Well, you're damned if you do
I know the answer. Well, you're damned if you do
Back: Deep, deep trouble
Bart: Well, you're damned if you do
And you're damned if you don't

[Verse 3]
As soon as they're gone, I'm stretched on the lawn
Lookin' at the sky with my sunshades on
Now I've never ever claimed that I was a smarty
But inspiration hits me, lets have a party
Called up my posse, they were here in a flash
They brought all their pals, we started to thrash
There was romping and stomping, an occasional crash
A fist fight or two, and Nintendo for cash
We raided the fridge, dogs raided the trash
I got a little worried when the windows got smashed
The next thing you know, Mom and Dad are home
The kids disappear and I'm all alone
Everything's silent except for my moan
And the low, bluesy tone of a saxophone
They look at me, then they go into a huddle
Get this sinking sensation I'm in deep, deep trouble
[Hook]
Back: Trouble
Homer: D'oh
Marge: Oh
Homer: Bart!
Bart: Oh, gimme a break
Back: Deep, deep trouble
Homer: Hey, what is this?
Back: Don't keep trouble
Marge: Go to your room
Lisa: Oh yeah
Marge: Bart, go to your room
Back: Deep, deep trouble
Marge: Go to your room
Bart: Okey, dokey
Homer: Bart!

[Verse 4]
There's a little epilogue to my tale of sadness
I was dragged down the street by his Royal Dadness
We rounded the corner and came to a stop
Threw me inside Jake's Barber Shop
I said, Please Sir, just a little off the top
Dude shaved me bare, gave me a lollipop
So on my head, there's nothing but stubble
Man, I hate being in deep, deep trouble

[Hook]
Back: Trouble
Bart: Well, you're damned if you do
Back: Trouble! Trouble!
Bart: Well, you're damned if you do
Back: Deep, deep trouble
Bart: Well, you're damned if you do
And you're damned if you don't
Back: Nothing but trouble
Bart: Aw, come on, man
Well, you're damned if you do
(What are we talking about?) Well, you're damned if you do
Back: Deep, deep trouble
Bart: (Where's your sense of humor?)
Well, you're damned if you do, and you're damned if you don't
Back: Trouble
Deep, deep trouble
Bart: Ha ha ha, ha ha
Back: Deep, deep trouble