[Verse 1: Fink]
I'm taking a ride to the liquor store
I'm looking for a beer and a little bit more
I'm gonna spend all the money she has
On a n*** girl in a dirty old magazine
Fifty cents cheaper than the real thing
Even though it may be a little bit disgusting
Can call her "bitch" and it ain't got no drama
It's called a new sensation called the right hand-a-rama

[Chorus: Fink]
I don't know why, I don't know why
It sure feels good most every time
I don't know why, I don't know why
It sure feels good most every time

[Post-Chorus: Fink]
Alright

[Verse 2: Fink]
Oh, Pamela and her five sisters
Are giving me a bad case of nasty blisters
A third degree burn going straight to my head
I guess my pipes are a little bit rusted
Close encounters of the strangest kind
I got the heebee-jeebees for the hundredth time
It didn't work out the way it was planned
All I got now is a beer in my hand
[Chorus: Fink]
I don't know why, I don't know why
It sure feels good most every time
I don't know why, I don't know why
It sure feels good most every time

[Post-Chorus: Fink]
(I'll tell you why) Woo! Alright