[Trinidad + Unnamed Female]
Real n***a shit

[Trinidad Playing Character of Unnammed Male]
Fuck, ain't shit on the fucking TV, my momma would call me right now

[Female Later Referred to as "Keisha"]
Who you on the phone with?

[M] Uh, my mama. Who else?

[F] Oh, alright. Baby, can you fix the roof in the back?

(Baby can you fix the roof, the roof)

[M] Hey man, come on with all that shit, man. I ain't no god damn "Rico the Roof Man," alright?

(Baby, can you fix the roof, baby?)

[F] Tch, ooh, well excuse me then!

[M] Yeah, you're excused, yeah, I know, uh-huh

(TWO DAYS LATER)

[F] Hey, baby. Can you come help me in the kitchen real quick? I think there's something wrong with the fuckin' sink
[M] Hey, man. I do not have on a shirt that says "Solomon the fucking Sink Man. I don't. I mean, come on now. The fuck

[F] Damn, babe. Alright...

(ONE WEEK LATER)

[M] Well, damn, this motherfucking place look crazy as hell. Anyways, man

[F] Baby, can you move them dishes off the table before you sit down?
...awwh, fuck...

[M] Man, come on with that shit, man! (Oh, nevermind, nevermind...) Hell you talking about "nevermind"?! Always asking me to do something, fuck I look like, man? Motherfucking Danny the Dish Man, ain't playing with yo ass, n***a! Fuck you thought this was? Fuck outta here. Motherfucking dishes, fuck these dishes!

[F] Man, what is his problem now? I know he know I like him, right?
Yeah, he gotta know that. Like, I don't have to deal with this... I mean, to be honest, I'm not dealing with this. I'm just not dealing with this!

(THE FOLLOWING WEEK)

[M] Oh, shit! God damn! That girl done cleaned the motherfucker up. Damn. Hm
*knocks* Keysha? Keysha? (Here I come) Let me talk to you right quick

What's up, Keysha? What's going on? The place look good, what's up?

[F] What's up?

[M] I mean I'm just sayin', I mean...
What you mean, "What's up?" I mean, damn!
How did the place get fixed up, you know what I'm sayin'? Like damn, we ain't talked in like a week
I'm just saying, I mean, what's up...?
Since we "What's up?"-ing and shit
[F] Oh, well, the neighbor did it

[M] What the fuck you mean the -- the neighbor did -- Hey, man, hey, I don't know what the fuck you got going on, whatchu...
What did he charge? What did he charge? What the fuck did he charge?

[F] I mean, he didn't charge us anything. He told me, either I can bake him a cake, or I can have sex with him

[M] *smack* What the fuck!?

Aw, shit, baby... baby, you gotta get up. Baby, aw, man, you gotta stop crying, man, I hate it when you cry and shit. Look, look, baby, baby, baby, I don't even -- I don't even know what to say. What do you want me to -- What do you want me to say?!?
What kind of cake did you make him?!
What kind of cake did you make him?

[F] A cake, eh? Well, unfortunately, my name is not Carrie the Cake Maker