I won't be a big fat nothing
'Cause that just ain't me
I won't be your boyfriend
Because you're just so ugly

I won't be
I won't be
I won't be no one but me
Oh, I won't be
I won't be
I won't be no one but me

I won't be a Grateful Dead freak
That shit makes me puke
I won't be your boyfriend
Because I just can't stand you

I won't be
I won't be
I won't be no one but me
Oh, I won't be
I won't be
I won't be no one but me

[Guitar lead]
I won't be
Oh, I won't be
I won't be
I won't be

I won't be
Oh, I won't be
I won't be
I won't be

I won't be, yeah yeah yeah
Oh, I won't be, yeah yeah yeah
Yeah yeah yeah yeah