A bunch of mental midgets following us all around
They're mentally negligible, but don't you put them down
Ugly guys who can't get laid in a chicken coup
Lots of girls who like to fight with horrible tattoos

They might've gotten taller, but they just won't grow up
To them it's not a good show unless someone's throwing up
The one cute chick who showed up turned out to be a guy
I asked it out for coffee, and they punched me in the eye

We fucked a few, but don't call 'em sluts
We never call 'em back, and now thеy hate our guts
Yeah yeah yеah, we love our fans
Oh yeah, we love our fans
Oh yeah, we love our fans
Oh yeah, we love our fans

They're always kind of smelly, but we love them just the same
They love Married With Children, and they think Oprah's lame
The guys are always friendly, and the girls are outta sight
Use caution when approaching them
A few are known to bite

We fucked a few, but don't call 'em sluts
We never call 'em back, and now they hate our guts
Yeah yeah yeah, we love our fans
Oh yeah, we love our fans
Oh yeah, we love our fans
Oh yeah, we love our fans