So you voted for Ronnie Reagan? Howdy do!
We've got a wonderful surprise in store for you
You got more than lower taxes and a larger lovelier home
You get a truly needy family of your own

Yes, you get an actual family in the mail
Once a month you'll get a letter without fail
With a picture how they're doing and a plea for help each time
But the best part is you never send a dime!


Oh, you got your boy in the White House like you always knew you would
And now it's time to take the poor and stick it to 'em good
You get the same heartwarming feeling of denying a dog his bone
With a truly needy family of your own, sir
A truly needy family of your own

You got more than a new cold war when you cast that vote
You got a chance to grab some poor folks by the throat
Now it feels like a million dollars to take some ghetto kid and say
Yes, you had a chance and I'm taking that chance away

You get lists of all the help they used to get
You can hear the old folks cough on a tape cassette
You can hear the rats all squealing as they scurry across the floor
And the sound of a street gang battering down the door
For it's time for a new beginning and we're beginning to see the light
No wonder folks are grinning and no wonder your hearts are light
You get the same heartwarming feeling of denying a dog his bone
With a truly needy family of your own, boss
A truly needy family of your own

It all comes in a plain brown wrapper to your address
Please regard it as a tribute to your success
You will follow your needy family as they suffer every blow
And if they lose their home, you'll be the first to know

We have all been told that life can be unfair
And now, once a month, "Hey, Presto, you are there!"
For success alone is not enough to make a life complete
It's seeing the other guy fail that makes it all so sweet!

And you got your boy in the White House like you always knew you would
And now it's time to take the poor and stick it to 'em good
You get the same heartwarming feeling of denying a dog his bone
With a truly needy family of your own, bwana
A truly needy family of your own