Sit down and listen to a story
About a cat that had his way
So bad as he would swagger and sway
The fact remains that he was
So gluttonous and fat
And he stole my haggis away!

Now there's a little saying
'Every dog will have his day'
Well Bootsy ain't no mutt
And he always got his prey
Sittin by the fire lickin victory
From his paws
Neeps and tatties in his whiskers
Gravy dripping from his jaws

Call him
Bootsy the Haggis-Eating Cat
Yeah they call him
Bootsy the Haggis-Eating Cat

It's not the first occurrrence
It happened all the time
You should see him
With my whiskey and wine
A cause, a struggle of wits
But from where Bootsy sits
A cunning feline state of mind
He was black, white voracious
A devil in disguise
With two great, big, green eyes
But when he leapt up on the table
It came as no suprise
When he took on a haggis twice his size

Bootsy the Haggis-Eating Cat
Yeah they call him
Bootsy the Haggis-Eating Cat Oh Yeah
Bootsy the Haggis-Eating
Bootsy the Haggis-Eating
Bootsy the Haggis-Eating Cat