[Verse 1]
I remember the year I went to camp
I heard about some lady named Selma and some blacks
Somebody put their fingers in the president's ears
And it wasn't too much later they came out with Johnson's wax
I remember the book depository where they crowned the king of Cuba
That's all I can think of, but I'm sure there's something else
Way down inside me, I can feel it coming back

[Chorus: John Linnell, (John Flansburgh)]
Purple toupee will show the way when summer brings you down
(Purple toupee when summer brings you down)
Purple toupee and gold lamé will turn your brain around
(Purple toupee and gold lamé)

[Verse 2]
Chinese people were fighting in the park
We tried to help them fight, no one appreciated that
Martin X was mad when they outlawed bell bottoms
Ten years later they were sharing the same cell
I shouted out, "Free the Expo '67!"
'Til they stepped on my hair and they told me I was fat
Now I'm very big, I'm a big, important man
And the only thing that's different is underneath my hat

[Chorus: John Linnell, (John Flansburgh)]
Purple toupee will show the way when summer brings you down
(Purple toupee when summer brings you down)
Purple toupee and gold lamé will turn your brain around
(Purple toupee and gold lamé)
[Bridge]
Purple toupee is here to stay
After the hair has gone away
The purple brigade is marching from the grave

[Outro]
La la la la la la la
La la la la la la la la
La la la
We're on some kind of mission
We have an obligation
We have to wear toupees