[Verse 1]
You're a mean one, Mr. Nerd
You really are a jerk
You're as shameless as a shit-mop
You've got mischief in your smirk, Mr. Nerd
I wouldn't blame you when you're playing Atari Berzerk

[Verse 2]
You're a vile one, Mr. Nerd
You've got demons in your soul
You're wacky and you're wicked
Your crap is full of coal, Mr. Nerd
You're as charming and fun as a grizzly bear with a gun

[Verse 3]
You're a foul one, Mr. Nerd
You're a dreadful, drunken schmuck!
Your mouth is full of cusses
Your mind is full of yuck, Mr. Nerd!
The three words that best describe you are, and I quote: Fick! Fack! Fuck!