Well I'm driving down the highway at the speed of light
Transporting meals in the middle of the night
Van drive quick–food keep hot
Old folk weep if the food be not hot

I'm driving so fast that I'm a-breaking the law
'Cause I got to get a snack to Mr Michelmore
Mr Savile's waiting for his muesli
And now Harry Secombe wants his pie and peas baby now

Meals on wheels
Feeding the old folk night and day, yeah-ay
Meals on wheels
Get out of my way!

I got a little oven and a couple of pans
So I can heat the meat in the back of the van
You see food get chilled–old folk weep
Hence the oven–do you see?

Meals on wheels
Feeding the old folk night and day, yow!
Meals on wheels
Get out of my way!

"Faster! Faster! Faster! Bring the beef you bastard!"
Cries Paula Abdul–"And don't forget the pasta!"
I'm steaming like a bitch down the highways of hell
And when I pass you muthas I ring my bell!
Meals on wheels
Feeding the old folk night and day, yeah!
Meals on wheels
Get out of my way!

Meals on wheels
Get out of my way!