"Hey who's that bald guy walkin' down the street?"
"Hi, this is Howard"
Ooh yeah
He's bald
Oh yeah

His name is Howard Wulkan
And his head's really shiny
His head is only balding
His baldness is really bad

Howard Wulkan's bald, bald
Howard Wulkan's bald, bald bald bald

You should be balding, yeah
You should be balding, yeah