My granny while on her deathbed
She turned and said to me
"Why must you view life so morbidly?
I tried to teach you right
But somewhere I went wrong
'Cause you sing those death, death, devil, devil, evil, evil songs."

When six pallbearers put her down
And laid her body in the ground
My eyes were wet, my face was very long
The pastor said, "Son, here you are
Won't you please take this guitar?
Sing dear departed Granny one last song."
And I sang

Death, death, devil, devil, devil, devil, evil, evil, evil, evil songs
Hell, you know that's how I get along
The world is full of tragedy so how can it be wrong
Singing death, death, death, death, devil, devil, evil, evil songs

Well, I was shopping at Hot Topic
And I was walking out the door
When two dumb jocks came up to me
They said, "Hey fag, it ain't Halloween!"
And they kicked my lipstick to the floor
And I sang
Death, death, devil, devil, devil, devil, evil, evil, evil, evil songs
Hell, you know that's how I get along
The world is full of idiots so how can it be wrong
Singing death, death, death, death, devil, devil, evil, evil songs

Well, I went down to church on Sunday
I sat up front in a pew
The priest said, "Jesus and Mary, too!
Son, what the Devil's got into you?
Get up and sing a hymn or two!"
And I sang

Death, death, devil, devil, devil, devil, evil, evil, evil, evil songs
Hey, you know that's how I get along
The world's full of hypocrisy so how can it be wrong
Singing death, death, death, death, devil, devil, evil, evil songs

I was invited to the White House
The president pulled me aside
He said, "Son, sing us a song of peace
For those evil-doers in the Middle East."
I rolled my eyes and kicked this rhyme
I sang...

Death, death, devil, devil, devil, devil, evil, evil, evil, evil songs
Hell, you know that's how I get along
The world is full of double U's so how can it be wrong
Singing death, death, death, death, devil, devil, evil, evil songs
Well, then I died and went to Hell
I could tell right away by the awful smell
That this was clearly not the pearly gates
The Devil said, "Come here young man
My wife and I are your biggest fans!"
So naturally I felt I had it made

Well, then he reached into an iron chest
And he picked the tool that he felt was best
And then he jabbed me in the schlong
With a pitchfork that had sharpened prongs
He turned to me and winked and sang this song
He sang

Death, death, devil, devil, devil, devil, evil, evil, evil, evil songs
Yeah, I know that's how you got along
I find your songs hilarious but now your soul's precarious
Singing your death, death, death, death, devil, devil, evil, evil songs
I'm just kidding, kid. Welcome to Hell, enjoy the buffet!

Death, death, devil, devil, devil, devil, evil, evil, evil, evil songs
Hell, you know that's how we get along
The world is full of sinners so how can it be wrong
Singing death, death, death, death, devil, devil, evil, evil songs