Aurelio Voltaire
The Mechanical Girl
[Verse 1]
In the court of Augustine the 12th
The king reprimanded his men and demanded
They put to good use all his wealth
To cure his deep ennui
For you see, he found that he was sad and lonely
Ever since his wife, the Queen, got mad
And rode off on his steed
[Verse 2]
In a glen beyond the castle wall
There was a tinker and he was a thinker
The smartest man in all the world
He made a mechanical girl
For you see, his daughter passed away last summer
And though he knew he could not replace her
He missed his family
[Verse 3]
Suddenly a knock at the door went rat-at-tat-tat-tat-tat-tat
And the king's men came in blowing horns
Ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba
"By order of his highness we're to take and that thing
To present your marvel to the king"
And so, over glen and through the castle walls
Over the moat and into the great castle hall
When her master urged, the robot girl emerged
[Verse 4]
When the king laid eyes upon the girl
He was delighted, his men all were knighted
He yelled aloud for all the world
"I'll take her for my queen!"
And the man screamed "Please don't take my child!
I beg you, mighty king!" but they grabbed him by his tailcoat
And threw him in the moat
[Verse 5]
Later in their wedding bed the king was shocked to see
A tender kiss upon the cheek unleashed an armory
Rocket launchers and flame throwing guns
Grew from her sides
And she grew to seven times her size!
Run!
[Verse 6]
On the morn of August 24th
He was dejected, when lest he expected
A knock was heard upon the door
It was his robot girl
For you see, he made her indestructible, it seems
And she destroyed that awful kingdom
And they lived happily
[Outro]
So you see, the moral of the story is
Never take a child away from a loving parent
Especially not ones who make children who shoot rockets from their eyes