I said one for the treble
Two for the bass
Come on, Pd
Let's rock the place

I said: 1 o'clock, 2 o'clock, 3 o'clock, rock
4 o'clock, 5 o'clock, 6 o'clock, rock
7 o'clock, 8 o'clock, 9 o'clock, rock
Gonna rock around the clock tonight

It don't take no doubts to put you right
I said one for the money
Two for the money
Three for the money
And four for the money

Five for silver
Six for gold
Seven is for heaven if you're feeling too old
I said eight for Barclays
Nine for NatWest
Ten is for me so f--- all the rest

Said eleven for the lolly
Twelve for the cash
This rap is so bad it'll give you the rash
1 and 3: unlucky 13
But I don't give a damn 'cos I'm Mr Mean
I'm mean y'all, I mean y'all
I don't think you know that I'm mean y'all
I don't think you know that I'm so mean
I've always got a trick right up my sleeve
If you've got no money that you can lend
I'll pinch some money off my best friend

I'm bad, I'm evil, I'm full of sin
I'll even punch money from the beggar's tin
I'll break your hearts, I'll break your locks
Steal my way in and out of Fort Knox

I'll nick a nickel, pinch a pound
Every time I see a pig I turn it upside down
Upside down, and all the way round
Every time I see a pig I turn it upside down
You can call me a pirate, call me a rogue
I'm mean, myself and minding my own
I'm always in black, never in red
It just ain't cool to be in debt

So if you're short, you know who to thank
It's Mr Mean and I run the bank
I'm mean y'all, I'm mean y'all
I don't think you know that I'm mean y'all
Three six nine
We don't drink wine
We don't smoke tobacco
But we have a good time
We don't get broke
We don't take dope
And we all went to Holland in a big ferry boat

N O R M A N C
Cooking it up for the family
I said S T A N L E Y
Cooking it up till it's higher than high
I said H and a U and a G and an H
Cooking it up till it's on the front page
P and an A and a U and a L
Cooking it up till it's hotter than hell

Norman Cook plays the bass
Strumming those strings all over the place
I said Stan Cullimore on guitar
Pd Heaton sing far, far, far
And finally Hughy boy
Playing those drums like a worn out toy

And I'm mean
I said give me an M
Mercy
Give me an E
Easy
Give me an A
Angry
Give me an N
That's nice
Let's rock the house again y'all
It's like that y'all
You're all fat y'all
And I'm talking to the people down the back y'all
And if you're true, blue, than you're dead too
'Cos you know that you talk a lot of crap now

Give me a J and an O and a Y
The music is hot
And it'll take you high
We got the joy down in our heart
Make the poor folk rich
And the rich folk fart

I put the Beho back into Boho
Put the Lib right back into Glib
Put the Yes No back into Don't Know
'Cos you'll probably deny that you did

I said F R E E D O M
Locked us up once
And they'll do it again
I said C H A I N E D
They locked up my friends
Now they're coming for me