[Verse 1]
These are your good years
Don't take my advice
You never wanted the nice boys, anyway
And I'm of good cheer
'Cause I've been checking my list
The gifts you're receiving from me will be

[Pre-Chorus]
One awkward silence
And two hopes you cry yourself to sleep
Staying up, waiting by the phone
And all I want this year's
For you to dedicate your last breath to me
Before you bury yourself alive

[Chorus]
Don't come home for Christmas
You're the last thing I wanna see
Underneath the tree
Merry Christmas, I could care less

[Verse 2]
Happy New Years, baby
You owe me the best gift I will ever ask for
Don't call me up when the snow comes down
It's the only thing I want this year
[Pre-Chorus]
One awkward silence
And two hopes you cry yourself to sleep
Staying up, waiting by the phone
And all I want this year
For you to dedicate your last breath to me
Before you bury yourself alive

[Chorus]
Don't come home for Christmas
You're the last thing I wanna see
Underneath the tree
Merry Christmas, I could care less

[Instrumental Bridge]

[Chorus]
Don't come home for Christmas
You're the last thing I wanna see
Underneath the tree (Don't come home for Christmas)
Merry Christmas, I could care less

Don't come home for Christmas
You're the last thing I wanna see
Underneath the tree (Don't come home for Christmas)
Merry Christmas, I could care less
[Outro]
Dude, sweet! They've recorded a Christmas song!
They must've spent a lot of money on this...
But this one time, this one Christmas I got this-