[Verse 1: Robert Jr.]
Shane, I'm waiting
For you inside the bathroom stall
Anticipating
Your footsteps coming down the hall

[Chorus 1]
As I stay still
Something makes me ill
My eyes grow wide until
They fill with tears

[Verse 2]
Visions haunt me
Just as they did when I was young
My poor father
Was given Robert as a son

[Chorus 2]
Robert being me
Shamed the family
Slow as slow could be
While his father had a PhD

[Verse 3]
Please have mercy
I'm doing everything I can
Robert Senior politely
Asked his son to stand
[Bridge: Robert Sr.]
Do you wanna know why
Your mother died?
When you were born
She couldn't bear to raise a boy like you
She just couldn't hack it
Her body attacked itself
By the time the birth was through
She was gone!
Gone!

[Verse 4: Robert Jr.]
Shane, I waited
To smash your head against the wall
My self-hatred
Makes me feel like no one at all

[Chorus 3]
I'll close my eyes
Listen to your cries
And try to feel my size
But my father's voice will not subside

[Outro]
Ah
Bah-ah
Ah
Bah-ah